A Response, Not Really Art Related...
I usually don't do this, but apparently this article and many other blogs in response to this blew up my news feed the past couple of weeks.
http://theblogwander.com/2014/01/02/23-things-to-do-instead-of-getting-engaged-before-youre-23/
And to preface this, I am not saying I agree or disagree with what she has to say here..
I think we are missing the whole point on why the article was probably written and why so many others either 'support' or 'oppose' it. Marrying young today is mostly thought of as "rushing into things". We haven't had enough 'life experience' to make a life long decision. "We hardly know the other person," they say. "You're wasting your life. Most of the marriages these days end up in divorce a few years down the road," etc. ...
Well, that is how our whole life is. Sometimes we have to rush into making decisions. We have to take risks. So marrying either young or old is a risk. How can you know you will be next to this person the rest of your life? That is a long time. Instead, remember why we have the whole celebration of matrimony. It's not for the dresses or suits, it's not for our families and friends, and it's not for the drinking and partying. It's for the vows. Catholic or any other religion. You are PROMISING to be there for the other. Through THICK and THIN (ALL hard times). Yes, we are "madly in love" but according to society and statistics, what do we have to show for it? We are tending to look at the recent future, and then life takes hold and the marriage is put on the back burner. (Instead of looking as your spouse as a companion and friend to hold your hand through it).
So yes, a lot of my friends or people I know are getting engaged and married. Some of them I am not sure what will happen 10 years from now. But others, I feel confident that they can make it. But things change. Those couples I am unsure about could end up having/making working relationship. While the other couples who had that fell through the cracks. It is all in perspective and how you make it together.
People are doubting you and looking down on you for marrying so early? Well prove them wrong. Work hard at your marriage. Don't talk yourself into thinking it was the right thing to do. Believe and make it be the right thing for you. If you still want to travel and do things, plan to do that. It might take a bit more work, but nothing is stopping you. Marriage is not something that ends your life and dreams. It gives you someone to believe in you and help push you toward your dreams.
But on the other hand, being single makes it at least 10x easier to do all those things you want. Because you can be more selfish. You only have to plan trips or career choices for yourself. Allowing less stress to worry and plan about someone else.
Both have benefits and downfalls. Do what is right for you, and don't worry about what others think. Everyday we try to prove ourselves. And we do that with every decision we make. People may scorn or applaud all they like. But take only the positives and move on.
And I am going to tie this in saying I can understand this because having and trying to make art a career is very similar. I live in Ohio. How am I going to make a living? Well, I am managing so far. And I don't ever plan on giving up on it.
http://theblogwander.com/2014/01/02/23-things-to-do-instead-of-getting-engaged-before-youre-23/
And to preface this, I am not saying I agree or disagree with what she has to say here..
I think we are missing the whole point on why the article was probably written and why so many others either 'support' or 'oppose' it. Marrying young today is mostly thought of as "rushing into things". We haven't had enough 'life experience' to make a life long decision. "We hardly know the other person," they say. "You're wasting your life. Most of the marriages these days end up in divorce a few years down the road," etc. ...
Well, that is how our whole life is. Sometimes we have to rush into making decisions. We have to take risks. So marrying either young or old is a risk. How can you know you will be next to this person the rest of your life? That is a long time. Instead, remember why we have the whole celebration of matrimony. It's not for the dresses or suits, it's not for our families and friends, and it's not for the drinking and partying. It's for the vows. Catholic or any other religion. You are PROMISING to be there for the other. Through THICK and THIN (ALL hard times). Yes, we are "madly in love" but according to society and statistics, what do we have to show for it? We are tending to look at the recent future, and then life takes hold and the marriage is put on the back burner. (Instead of looking as your spouse as a companion and friend to hold your hand through it).
So yes, a lot of my friends or people I know are getting engaged and married. Some of them I am not sure what will happen 10 years from now. But others, I feel confident that they can make it. But things change. Those couples I am unsure about could end up having/making working relationship. While the other couples who had that fell through the cracks. It is all in perspective and how you make it together.
People are doubting you and looking down on you for marrying so early? Well prove them wrong. Work hard at your marriage. Don't talk yourself into thinking it was the right thing to do. Believe and make it be the right thing for you. If you still want to travel and do things, plan to do that. It might take a bit more work, but nothing is stopping you. Marriage is not something that ends your life and dreams. It gives you someone to believe in you and help push you toward your dreams.
But on the other hand, being single makes it at least 10x easier to do all those things you want. Because you can be more selfish. You only have to plan trips or career choices for yourself. Allowing less stress to worry and plan about someone else.
Both have benefits and downfalls. Do what is right for you, and don't worry about what others think. Everyday we try to prove ourselves. And we do that with every decision we make. People may scorn or applaud all they like. But take only the positives and move on.
And I am going to tie this in saying I can understand this because having and trying to make art a career is very similar. I live in Ohio. How am I going to make a living? Well, I am managing so far. And I don't ever plan on giving up on it.
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